One day you wake up and your babies are toddlers. Then you turn around and they are in college, they are working, and they are having families of their own. You feel like your heart is going to burst because then they give you grandchildren! While raising your family, you do many things without thinking; you are planting a garden, canning, cleaning house, sewing, having a baby, washing clothes, helping with homework and starting school but something else has also changed. You are getting older.
You assume this will happen, heck, we hope this will happen but I know I didn’t think about what the reality would be. My new goal of running is making me open my eyes to what has been going on for the last forty years. It sounds cliche but where has the time gone? And if I am asking rhetorical questions, where did these flabby arms come from?
One day, you are in okay shape and then “BAM” it happened. You assume you would never change but it doesn’t work like that. You have to make a conscience effort to do the things that previously were just a part of your life. With no garden to tend, now I have to do squats. I can’t chase my children and pick them up and throw them in the air. Number one, I couldn’t catch them and two – they are too big. Now I need to lift weights and exercise.
As a new mom, I always wished children came with an instruction manual. Yes, there were books out that let you know what to expect when they are 3 months, 6 months, 1 year, 2 years, etc., but nothing to tell you what to tell them what to do so they will believe in themselves, be the awesome individual you knew they were and have great memories of growing up. Nothing, to tell you how to handle those tough decisions that parents have to make. My decisions were often made by prayer and gut feelings. I’m sure my choices were not always the right one but now they get to make those same decisions for their family. Hopefully, they now understand better what me and their dad went through.
When my life made a turn (that I didn’t realized was even in motion), I sure could have used a book to wake me up. Hey, when you turn 30, better start laying off the fried foods. Okay, now you are 40, better start lifting weights. 50 – start those pre-menopausal vitamins and make a workout schedule and stick to it! That would have prepared me better for what I face now…that I have missed some precious years and now have to practice “catch up” time. But I am determined. It’s like competing in a race and always getting beat but in this race, the person beating you is you. I have bought books on running, have the best shoes for running and the appropriate spandex attire but what it boils down to is this is something I will have to work at. It is not going to come easy for me because there were many years that I was way too sedentary and frankly indifferent to maintenance. So why not give up? Because what would that book say at age 60, age 65, age 70? Do I want to still have this 25 year old image in my mind and not be able to run across the yard? Do I want to be too old to go and do everything I want to do? Yeah, I don’t think so. It sucks that now I will have to work at something that was so natural before but that is what it is. Time is speeding by me and I want to continue enjoying them. For me to enjoy the next 20, 30, 40 years, I have to stop taking things for granted.
Okay, I know I have been rambling. I think I am determined and scared. Scared that I may talk myself out of quitting again. I stink at running. I’m not stopping now but I know that it would be way too easy to stop for just a little while. What the 25 year old in me wants is to consider this a new day and start new habits that will stay with me for the next 25 years.
Here are workout songs on my playlist, don’t judge remember I have a 25 year old struggling to get out 🙂
- Thrift Shop
- Don’t Stop the Party
- Air Force Ones
- Break Your Heart
- Right Round